A moment of reflection

I’m sitting here at the coffee shop, listening to Tom Waits after a great bike ride and I can’t help but reflect on my life. I’ve had some (rare) good fortune lately in a lot of respects, and I am quite grateful for it. That’s not to say there haven’t been low points as well, but I’d prefer to focus on the positive and keep my head in the right place.

My house is coming along beautifully. I have a couple new roommates whom I like very much. They’re incredibly kind, sincere people who have a genuine interest in helping me make the house the best it can be. The vibe in the house has changed 180° in the last month and I couldn’t be happier about it. There is a great sense of community now. Shared dinners, bonfires in the backyard, good conversation…no drama or stress.

When I think about how much my life has changed in the last 9 months, I am left amazed and humbled. I could very easily sit here and talk about how these changes didn’t start happening until I started following my heart and welcomed God back into my life, but I won’t do that. After being turned off by overly-excited religious zealots who preached their beliefs to me whether I asked or not, I promised myself I wouldn’t be that type of person. I most certainly have God in my heart and fully believe I have been saved by his Grace, but that’s a discussion I leave for those who are curious and want to talk about it. I have many friends who are not religious and I respect their beliefs and opinions. I dunno….maybe I will write more about that another time and just preface it with a warning for all those “non-believers” out there.

In other happy news, my parents are coming out for a visit and should arrive sometime today. I haven’t seen then since Christmas, and I’m really looking forward to spending some time with them (and showing off the improvements around the house). I honestly couldn’t ask for better parents. They’re wonderful friends and I love them dearly.

Well, I’ve got a friend meeting me for coffee in a moment and I feel that I’m rambling a bit anyway, so I’m going fold up the old laptop and light up a cigar.

I hope everyone out there has a wonderful weekend and I thank you, as always, for taking a moment to read this.

On a side note…

I strongly believe that I wouldn’t be where I am today without the work of Pastor Jay Bakker and the wonderful people at Revolution Church. Unfortunately, they are facing a very hard time financially right and could really use your help. I realize times are tough for all of us, but if you can spare anything please do so. You can make donations HERE.

Manners

One of my favorite hobbies is observing people. It’s some of the most interesting free entertainment out there. The more I watch people, the more I notice the similarities between people. One of the more common traits I’ve been noticing lately is, unfortunately, a negative one. People seem to be lacking manners. Obviously, this doesn’t pertain to ALL people. I’m speaking very generally. I’m also speaking somewhat regionally, as though I’ve traveled the world, although my usual observations happen here in Southern California.

Sometimes it’s as if certain objects have the ability to render my fellow Californians manner-less. The steering wheel is a perfect example of this. For some odd reason, the simple act of holding a steering wheel in one’s hands instantly negates the desire to show good manners. Turn signals are meaningless; “right of way” seems more like an obscure theory than a commonly known courtesy. And parking lots? Oh, don’t even get me started on parking lots. Try backing out of a parking spot and your reverse lights suddenly become the green light at a drag strip.

Long gone are the days where strangers would smile and say hello when passing. Want that door opened for you? It better damn well be automated. Of course, if you’re one of the rare people that still does open doors for strangers; don’t expect to get a “thank you” or a smile. That would require too much effort from the recipient.

It would be far too easy (and inaccurate) to claim this is a generational issue. I used to think that, but it’s not true. I’ve observed the same selfish behavior from well-to-do 50 year olds as I have from college kids and want-to-be hipsters. No, instead of blaming any group of people for the demise of manners, I’d rather focus on whether or not we care about it.

In our ever-growing global community, are we willing to sacrifice the quality of our interactions for the quantity of our interactions? Are we so busy texting and twittering that we can’t look up from our iPhones long enough to smile and say thank you? Every day I see compassion on the internet. Someone will post a journal about the rough time they’re having or change their status on Facebook only to be flooded with kind words and condolences from people they may not know or ever meet. But where is that compassion in real life? Why is it so much easier for us to show kindness through keyboards than gestures?

My fear is that people have become so used to detached interaction through technology that they no longer crave quality interpersonal relationships in the real world. Has our instant-gratification, low attention span society simply forgotten how to properly relate to one another? I mean, it’s certainly easier to skim through someone’s journal and type a quick “LOL” than to sit and listen intently to someone’s story and actually laugh, right?

Personally, I think we’re at a rather important crossroad, where manners can either make a comeback or become another fondly remembered, quaint bit of history, like straight-razor shaving and block parties. We, as a global community have the power to make either a reality. Personally, I’m hoping for the comeback.

My thought for the day

Avoid people who belittle your ambitions and challenge your self esteem. People like that will rarely change.
The great people…the truly great people will help you realize that you can become great as well.

Love yourselves. Never settle.

R.I.P. Michael

Michael Jackson, passed away today at the age of 50.
Regardless of what you may think of the man, he was a musical hero to many people (myself included) and left behind an amazing musical legacy.

Rest in peace Michael. You will be missed.

Another (grey) day in paradise

It’s a beautifully gloomy day today here in Southern California. It’s just cool enough to wear a sweater without being uncomfortable and the sky is covered in a wash of grey. The majority of my day has been spent doing housework, so I figured I’d take a break. Write a bit. Read a bit. More than likely, I’ll have a cigar at some point.

Life has been interesting, as I continue to learn more about myself and what I want out of life. I’m doing my best to be brutally honest with myself in regards to who I really am. I’ve spent so many years of my life trying to be what others wanted me to be (or at least what I assumed they wanted me to be), that I lost sight of my own goals and desires. Some of the personal discoveries I’ve made were rather expected, while others have truly surprised me. Especially in regards to my own spirituality (something I may share at a later time).

Currently, my biggest struggle seems to be with patience and forgiveness. Neither come as naturally to me as I’d like, but I’m hoping through practice they will. At least it’s something I’m consciously working on.

Anyway…I’ve got a couple dogs to walk and a book to finish, so I better get going.

Oh, I almost forgot… If you find yourself with a couple extra dollars, please consider donating to my church. They’ve been having some trouble lately and could use the help. Their website is currently down, so here’s a link to their staff web blog (which has a donation link on it): Revolution Church NYC

Thank you.